Don’t Let My Advanced Age And “Dog Grandpa” Bumper Sticker Fool You - I Am Still A Virile Cocksman Who Isn’t Above Switching Teams To Cuddle With A “Cat Aunt”

Financial Decisions You Make Today Will Ultimately Determine The Type Of Cat Food You Will Subsist On In Retirement: Generic Dry Kibble Or That Super Fancy Wet Stuff That Comes In A Can

Checking In After A Week-Long Digital Detox Confirmed My Suspicions That My Friends And Followers Give Fuck-All About My Fraught Relationship With Technology

Her Affair With The Sign Spinner Was Disappointing And Drawn Out, Much Like The Dress Barn Going Out Of Business Liquidation Sale That He Had Been Advertising